REVIEW: The Studio Theater's Production of Hand to God, Washington, DC

Last night as part of my birthday, Rebecca and I saw Hand to God, performed at the Studio Theater in Logan Circle, DC.  Let me do my best to describe this unique event.

Upon entering the theater, you are directed into the large service elevator that take 4 minutes to take you up to the 4th floor.  Upon commenting to the usher in the elevator that the ride is slow, you are informed that the other elevator is much larger and used to transport cars, event though it is the same speed.  You do not see how this response is relevant.

Upon entering the theater, you are directed to your seat at a small table.  The majority of the room is comprised of large folding tables covered in blue and white checkered plastic tablecloth.  There is a small stage at each end of the room.  On one of the side walls is a concession stand.  There is a walkway down the middle between the two stages.  All of the walls are covered in church banners saying things like, "God loves you!" and "Jesus Saves!"  The effect is complete and it feels like you are in the basement of a traditional church.

The main character or rather characters are Jason, played by Liam Forde and his puppet, Tyrone.  Jason is a teenager coping with the recent loss of his father.  Also Jason's mom, Margery, played by Susan Rome, is suffering from the loss.  She is the teacher of the church puppet group.  The other teenagers in the puppet class are Timothy and Jessica.  There is also Pastor Greg.

Jason and the more demented version of Tyrone

You are quickly shown that there is a tangled web of infatuation going on, where Tim is "in love" with his teacher, Margery, Past Greg also is infatuated with her.  Meanwhile, Margery's son, Jason, is infatuated with Jessica.  But the real start of the show is Tyrone, Jason's sadistic and maniacal puppet that takes a life of its own as an alternative personality of Jason.  While various sex and love antics are going on with others and Margery, Tyrone becomes more and more unpredictable and dangerous.

The acting was incredible all around.  Liam Forde was fantastic, somehow mastering not just his own personality but also Tyrone's, including incredibly adept manipulation of the puppet.  You sometimes forgot that Tyrone was being controlled by a human, even though Liam was fully visible to everyone.  It wasn't just comedic, either.  There was anger, dread, pain, and Liam performed all of them excellently.  Susan Rome was also top notch.  Her performance was consistent and strong.  I know they were professionals but I couldn't believe they could resist laughing at some of the things that happened!  And in the more serious moments, you could of heard a pin drop.  The other characters were also great, especially Ryan McBride as Timothy, who acted aloof and naively in love the entire time.  His lines were almost entirely comedic and always delivered with great timing.

The only real negative of the play, in my opinion, was the ending.  It didn't ruin it, by any means.  After all the action that essentially concluded the play, Tyrone came back like nothing had happened out of a curtain in the concession stand and unleashed a string of statements that made it clear the screenwriter either was trying to convey an unnecessary message or simply didn't know how to close out the play.  It was awkward and left a bad taste in my mouth, but it didn't matter because the rest of the play was so strong.

Definitely go see it!  It's only through August!

Chip

It's My Birthday and I'll Cry if... Wait, Why Would I Cry?

Rebecca was just singing that song to wake me up for my birthday and it occurred to both of us that the lyrics are actually kind of depressing.  You would cry, too, if it happened to you?  What happened to her at her party?  Why is she depressed and yet singing in such an upbeat fashion?  Cyndi, what happened!? Was some boy mean to you!?  Lemme at 'im!

I'm 37 today.  It doesn't feel like a "37 is the new 27" or anything.  It just feels precariously close to 40.  Usually Rebecca is the one that is traumatized by birthdays because it makes her assess how little (in her mind) she has accomplished in her life.  That's me this year, for some reason.  If I press myself, it's more like, "Yeah I've done stuff but what have I done lately???"  And yes I know I'm being hard on myself but I don't know any other way.  Soft on myself sounds lazy and unmanly.  Juuuuust right on myself doesn't really compute.  Thanks for being no help at all, Goldilocks.

For my birthday, Rebecca is taking Tucky for her dog walk this morning so I don't have to, even though she needs to get to work (Rebecca, not Tucky).  So that's nice.  She also made me some bourbon fudge made with Lexington Bourbon.  Delicious.  Tonight we are going out for an early Italian dinner and then a musical based on puppets, which sounds freakin' awesome to me.  Make fun if you will, I don't care.  I love both puppets and musicals so this is the best of both worlds.  When the Muppets sing songs I have always been secretly mesmerized by both the glory of puppets singing and that the audience seems to enjoy it regardless of the terrible vocal ability.  I have always felt pressure to sing perfectly (otherwise nobody will like it), so this was a novel idea to me.

When Rebecca took Tucky out, I thought, "For my birthday I will gift myself the freedom to enjoy the day and not worry about the future," smiling warmly like I was wise or something.  Then I immediately thought, "What kind of garbage is this? What happened to the days when I'd get Contra for Nintendo and be more ecstatic than somebody that just won an Oscar?  I wouldn't even say, "I'd like to thank my mother and father."  I'd say, "THANKS YOU GUYS!!! HOLY COW IT'S CONTRA!!!!"  And then immediately run to the basement to play it, enjoying the fact that it was brand new and I wouldn't have to blow in it or the Nintendo to make it work.  What happened to that?  You know you are 37 when, for your birthday, you gift yourself the ability to enjoy the day.  Bleh.  I gift myself this blog, instead, and the freedom to write about this stuff instead of just think it.  This is for me, not for you.  If you like it, I will be very happy.  But if you don't, then that's okay, too.

Happy birthday to me!  1/3 of the way to 111.  People might say to that, "I'd be happy to live to 111."  But it depends on what that life looks like, doesn't it?  Here's to making the most of it.

Chip

PS - Up, down, up, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, B, A, select, start.  Every American guy my age knows this, oddly.  You would, too, if you had memorized cheat codes out of Nintendo Magazine, sitting in the magazine aisle of the grocery while your mom shopped.

Tucky and her Macaroni and Cheese

Hi,

My name is Chip.  The purpose of this blog is.... to be determined.  I have another blog that I wrote in for a few years about recovery from my accident and felt somewhat limited by its focus.  Thus, this new blog.

I'll probably blog about random things like something funny that happened to me, Tucky, my wife Rebecca, or some combination of those.  I believe that we all need to laugh more and that I, personally, am in danger of being too serious too often.  Maybe I'll blog about serious stuff, too.  I don't know, yet.

As a starter, here are the music and lyrics to a song I performed spontaneously, without any planning, one day to my family.  When everyone laughed and asked me to perform it again to record it, I somehow remembered most of it.  I'm sure the bourbon helped it along somewhat.


"Tucky and her Macaroni and Cheese"

There once was a town with one stoplight
and in that town at night
the dogs would howl!
And they said when they howled, "Give us macaroni and cheese!"
And the owners said, "Don't be silly dogs!  You can't have macaroni and cheese!"
And they cried.

Except for one dog, named Tucky.
And she went to the other dogs and she said, "I think I can get that macaroni and cheese!"
And the other dogs said, "How you gonna get that cheese, dog?"
And Tucky just kind of looked at 'em with a weird look in her eye and smiled.
And then she walked away.... and there passed: three days.

And the dogs began to wonder, "What happened to Tucky?  Maybe the owners didn't like that she wanted macaroni and cheese and... took her outside (to shoot her)."
But then, on that 4th day, they saw her walking from a distance down the road.
And she had a rope tied around her neck and they said, "Oh no!  Maybe that's a dog owner's rope!"
But as she got closer she saw that, tied to that rope was...
A big red wagon filled with macaroni and cheeeeese!

And they ate to their hearts' content.
And when they were done eatin', they laid on their backsides and rubbed their bellies with their paws.
And then finally they walked up to Tucky and said, "Tucky! We have to know! How did you get that macaroni and cheese!!?!?"
And she just kinda smiled and looked and 'em with that look in her eye and said, "That's a secret I plan to keep to myself."

This has been the story of Tucky and her macaroni and cheese!!!!

'Til next time.  Feel free to give me topics to write about.

Chip